How I can help
Therapy for low self-esteem and self-worth
Therapy for low self-esteem helps you understand where your harsh inner voice and sense of not being good enough came from, and gradually build a kinder, more realistic relationship with yourself. I work with adults online across the UK and internationally, and in person in Farringdon, London, combining a warm, accepting relationship with psychodynamic and CBT-informed ideas.
Recognise this?
You might notice…
- A critical inner voice that picks apart everything you do
- Brushing off compliments but holding onto every criticism
- Comparing yourself with others and always coming up short
- Apologising often, even when you have done nothing wrong
- Holding back from opportunities in case you fail
- Feeling like a fraud and waiting to be found out
Not sure where to start?
An initial consultation is a simple way to see if we’re a good fit. No pressure.
Send an enquiryWhat low self-esteem can feel like
Low self-esteem is the way you see and value yourself. When it is low, you may carry a constant sense that you are not good enough, not likeable enough or not deserving of good things. It can sit quietly in the background or shout loudly, especially when you make a mistake or feel rejected.
Low self-esteem often hides behind other things. Some people become perfectionists and work relentlessly to prove their worth. Others people-please, struggle to say no or stay in relationships that leave them feeling small. Many people who seem confident on the outside describe feeling like an impostor on the inside.
It is not a personality flaw. Self-esteem is usually shaped by early experiences: how we were treated, what we were told about ourselves, and what we had to do to feel accepted. Bullying, criticism, neglect, discrimination or being compared with others can all leave lasting marks.
How I work with low self-esteem
I'm not here to fix you, because I do not believe you are broken. I'm here to walk alongside you as you get to know yourself with more curiosity and less judgement.
A relationship built on acceptance
Person-centred therapy rests on the idea that people grow when they feel genuinely accepted. Many people with low self-esteem have rarely experienced being listened to without being judged. In our sessions, I aim to offer that steady acceptance, and over time it can become easier to offer it to yourself.
Exploring where it began
Drawing on psychodynamic ideas, we can gently look at the messages you absorbed growing up and how they may still be shaping the way you speak to yourself today. Understanding that your inner critic once had a reason to exist can make it easier to question it now.
Noticing and challenging the inner critic
Using CBT-informed ideas, we can notice the thoughts that drive low self-esteem, such as "I always get it wrong" or "people only put up with me", and look at the evidence for and against them. We might also explore small experiments, like accepting a compliment or saying no, at a pace that feels manageable.
Noticing what is already there
Alongside understanding the inner critic, we can notice what is already there: your strengths, your values and the ways you have coped. Many people with low self-esteem find this surprisingly hard at first, and that is fine. It is something we can practise slowly, without forcing positivity or pretending things feel better than they do.
Low self-esteem often overlaps with other difficulties. If you also struggle with worry, my page on anxiety may help, and if it shows up most in your relationships, you may find my page on relationship difficulties useful.
What to expect
It starts with an initial consultation, which you can arrange through my contact page. We will talk about what is going on and whether my approach feels right. If we decide to work together, our first session is about getting to know you and what you would like to change. You can read more about the first session.
I offer sessions online across the UK and internationally, and in person in Farringdon, Central London. Change in how we see ourselves tends to happen gradually, and we will review how things are going together along the way.
Questions
Common questions
Can therapy help with low self-esteem?
Many people find therapy helps them understand where their low self-worth comes from and begin to be kinder to themselves. Change tends to be gradual, and we work at a pace that feels right for you.
What causes low self-esteem?
It is often shaped by early experiences, such as criticism, bullying, neglect or feeling you had to earn approval. Later experiences, such as difficult relationships, job loss or discrimination, can also affect how we see ourselves.
Is impostor syndrome a sign of low self-esteem?
It can be. Many people who feel like a fraud at work are highly capable but find it hard to believe in their own abilities. Therapy can help you explore where this feeling comes from and why it persists.
How long does therapy for self-esteem take?
There is no set length. Because self-esteem is often rooted in long-standing patterns, some people prefer longer-term support, while others come for a shorter period with a specific focus. We review this together regularly.
